Peanut Butter, Jelly, and Champagne

Hello, kiddies! After a life like mine, a boy needs a drink. That's right, a whole damned bottle of champagne! And el vino did flow whilst I partooken in a PBJ sammich. It's high-brow meets low-brow in my tummy. Point being, I got giddy.

And if you know me, you're probably thinking, "Who the F is this dude and where's my Chris?" That's right, I can easily count on one hand the number of days I came home and said that tonight is the night I bathe my brain with alcohol. In fact, when I want a drink I ususally want one froo-froo drink and I'm done. But tonight was not that night.

Let's recap. I've gotten tired of the shiat in my life. For part of it, read the previous post. I'm too lazy and loopy to make a hyperlink, so piss off. It's all the uptightness, listening to students' trivial bloo-blah, my ridiculous school-boy nature (again, see previous post), and all the reticence, over-analyzation, metathinking, and such-n-such. Today was the capstone on a chunk of my life best left behind. Hello, catharsis, let's purge.

So I lit every candle in my house, blasted my iPod through the tuner, sang and danced, and drank a bottle of champagne. Then Adva came over and got to bear witness to the hilarity that is me under the influence. If you think I'm funny in a cranky kind of way, you should see me like this. I manage to combine cranky and silly into one. Mix with some dancing and Dave Matthews, serve slightly drunk. And the night culminated with a trip to Taco Bell for some delicious take-out. I made Adva laugh so hard at the drive-thru, she could barely speak to the woman at the window. It was classic. I needed this. Tonight was a fantabulous escape from my reality.

6 comments:

bryan said...

I suggest zanny experiments where you mix this side of you with the everyday side, maybe add a control where you get boozed up but then have to do something specific, complete a puzzle or go on a scavenger hunt or write a poem or something. Be crazy, but add rules to it so you can deal with it. Or cut out and just fly somewheres, throw a dart at the world map and go there tomorrow, meet up for aynonamus sex over the internet, do something impulsive for its own sake, start recording your piano playing and play it to strangers, submit an article to a newspaper; some crazy antic just to distract your self from the boyish love thing, or just dive right into that and over do it to a humorous extent. Peanut and Butter Jelly!

Allie D. said...

I hope you are feeling without hangover, my friend. And I have added another goal to my life's list to see you in this state, in person. LOL

Of course if you managed to avoid singing Love is a Battlefield in karaoke in front of about 100 drunk people (like I did 2 weeks ago after about 5 screwdrivers) then I still got yo ass beat. ;)

Glad to see you letting loose and sublimating a little bit. We all need that. :)

Army said...

Good ideas, Bryan. It's always fun to shake things up when the going gets stale. I might try out some of your suggestions : )

Allison, for you, I think I will explore this state again. But only if we can also reenact our high school youth AND pretend to get into a car fight!

"Who the fuck are you?!" LOL

Allie D. said...

Maybe while under the influence, we will both figure out how to replicate that awesome cross-handed face slap we did that one time at the bowling alley. LOL

Jill said...

Damn, it's times like this I wish I didn't live out in the boonies of New England, because I would have loved to see that.

I hope your journey into the blissed out world of booze was a happy one, one that makes you want to imbibe in the future.

Army said...

Wow, looks like I need to demo the new me to all my friends! I'll be a lush, yet. Where's that bottle of Thunderbird (rummages through pile of empty bottles)