Other Straight Men I Love (But Not in THAT Way)

So I tried putting a funny spin on my recent "love-sick boy" routine and think of some other straight men I simply love for who they are. I have compiled a little list here...not sure how long it will be because I haven't planned out who all I want to mention. Here goes:

1. Bill Maher. He's witty, sensible, a smart ass, and makes me bust out laughing. He's totally a social liberal, but isn't afraid to tell Democrats they suck as bad as the Republicans do. He has strong opinions and isn't afraid to voice them...even to the point of getting fired from ABC's Politically Incorrect. Eh, they're loss. Cable TV is his true venue because he and his guests can be blunt and cuss like they mean it! I listen to his podcasts of Real Time with Bill Maher and relish in his ability to tell stuff like it is.

Favorite recent quote from Real Time: "We all have a big laugh about how Muslims are rioting over a cartoon, but then I read that the top climatologist at NASA was shut up by the White House from talking about global warming. And we have a big laugh about how medieval the Muslims are, but what can be more medieval than silencing a scientist? So I guess my question is, are we any better?"

2. Dave Matthews. So much to say about Dave. He's a musical talent like no other, and when he puts his mind to it, writes awesome lyrics. He croons, he scats, and he screams his head off. The band's live shows are spellbounding. And when you hear Dave talk, you realize what a funny, off-centered guy he is.

Sweet lyrics: "I was just wondering if you'd come along. Hold up my head when my head won't hold on. I'll do the same if the same's what you want. And if not, I'll go."

3. Ricky Gervais. This dude is a NUT! I first discovered his comedic genius on the BBC show The Office where he plays an idiot boss with uncomfortable humor. After watching the DVD extras, I realized Ricky didn't really have to act all that much -- because he's so much like the character David Brent! And now I listen to his podcast like a coke fiend because he's so so damned hilarious! He is completely insane. His humor is quick, bizarre, and spot on. I've taken to impersonating him so much that my coworkers hate me. God bless you, Ricky.

Great quote from his character David Brent: "I am an entertainer; a motivator of people. It's like bloody Dead Poet's Society out there sometimes. You know, at the end where they all stand up on the desks and...well, not literally, we wouldn't want them standing on the desks...it's against health and safety, for one thing..."

4. Jerry Seinfeld. A poignant comedian. His jokes are not snide or at the expense of others. He doesn't swear. He just makes random observations by looking at the world in his own way. He co-created one of my very favorite sitcoms -- I own the entire series of Seinfeld and watch it religiously. What else can I say...he's just too damned funny for his own good!

Excellent quote: "What's with the Ottoman Empire? Is this a whole society based on putting your feet up?"

Well, it's late, I'm tired, and I can't go on. But I must make some honorable mentions for the other straight men I love:

Larry David - co-creator of Seinfeld and creator of Curb Your Enthusiasm
J. Michael Straczynski - creator of Babylon 5
Jon Stewart - host of The Daily Show
Robert Jordan - author of Wheel of Time series
J.J. Abrams - creator of Alias, co-creator of Lost
Bill Murray - Groundhog Day, What About Bob, and Ghostbusters...just to name a few!


Allie D. said...

A great great great list!!!

Jonathan said...

Nice list,but Dave Matthews? Really? Sorry, but no.

Army said...

Jonathan, I don't think you realize what fighting words you just "spoke" on my blog! It's like throwing dirt and spitting in my eye simultaneously! LOL

We'll have to agree to disagree on this one. I think Dave is a great musical artist, a strong donator to environmental causes and other charities, and he rocks my world. Those are me thinks and I'm sticking to 'em.

Allie D. said...

LOL!! I gotcho back, Chris! Jonathan, prepare to have your world rocked! ;)

Jonathan said...

No dirt throwing or spitting, please. I'm a lover not a fighter, baby. I will totally give you mad props for listing Jon Stewart.

Anonymous said...

Jon Stewart and Bill Murray? Tight.

Robert said...

Great List. Great Laughs.

stringydildo said...

Ummmm, I think you forgot Keegan-Michael-Keenan-Ivory-Keegan-Michael-Key-Michael-Keegan-Key.